Friday, February 4, 2011

Blue Skies

The color blue is a contradiction. As a wee little girl it was inexplicably my favorite color. Probably because I always had to go against the norm and didn't want to be like all the other little girls liking pink and purple. Then as I got a little older I decided to broaden my horizon and changed my favorite color to "all pastels"- a clear indicator of indecisive and very open minded personality ;). Back to why blue is such a contradiction.. We have the blues and you can be feeling blue, but then there is the research that suggests blue is one of the most calming colors. "They" recommend wearing blue to an interview because it calms the interviewers and indicates confidence. Also, blue skies are of course associated with joy and happy days.

Now the question must be asked, what does all of this have to do with hope for the future and social work and my life. Well I feel as if this week was a "blue" week. It contradicted itself. Even though I met some of my monthly deadlines for the first time since I started while also having to deal with a few emergencies, we have a very important review which I was unable to focus on because there just wasn't enough time. It was a better week because my roommate Erin is now interning at the office and we hired some new workers and so now I'm feeling a lot less like the young clueless naive worker. I'm also feeling less like this because I finally have some idea what I'm doing... I might even be considered an expert by this point :). Then there is the sadness of having a former client come to me a month behind in rent. Life in general is a day by day roller coaster, but this job seems to be a minute by minute roller coaster.

I'm realizing that blue is not necessarily a contradiction, but rather a color of many emotions. Social work is a lot like the color blue. Perhaps inherently this is why my 8 year old very dramatic self always declared blue as my ultimate favorite color, and now at age 22 I am re-claiming this color, but instead of as a childish favorite, it is the color of life.

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